No one likes baths. What a waste of time! There’s so much more important stuff to do! Plus, baths are super dangerous for a number of reasons. You want me to list a few? Most household accidents happen in the bathroom. Scientific fact! A kid in Texas turned into a prune after taking a bath. Scientific fact!
If you need more evidence, allow me to point you to an excellent book called 101 Reasons Why I'm Not Taking a Bath. It’s full of insightful and logical reasons why you should definitely not be subjected to this useless ritual. Joy Ang and Stacy McAnulty really understand how dumb baths are, and have done a top-notch job of demonstrating why.